Wednesday, November 16, 2005

am i right or am i right?

I've been having weird dreams these past few days and it involves Sam Milby.
I'm not kidding. I wish I were but this morning, when my mom's waking me up, I find it hard to get up and just told her, "Sorry Ma, nananaginip pa ko eh, tapos nandun si SAM!" Ibang level diba? Nababaliw na ko because of the past incidences.

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We've already met all our professors. Some look nice, but I'm terrified at some. I actually liked Sir Al Dimalanta for reasons that, he likes to kid around, he practices PR, and he has a band. Ang cool kasi I've never known a professor who plays loud music. I've never heard them yet, but I just think it's cool!

Second favorite, Mam Sese. Ewan ko, but unlike Mam Verdeflor, she doesn't bore me to death. And she likes to watch PBB. Sabi pa niya, "8:30 papauwiin ko na kayo para maabutan nating lahat yung Big Brother!" and believe me, she really meant it. At kamusta naman ang pagsayaw niya sa Pinoy Ako diba?
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Before I wrap things up, I don't know if you'll ever read this, but I'm taking the chance, siguro naman after posting it to three blogs, you'd somehow stumble to one.

"I'm slightly affected of what you said last Sunday. I'm confused of your intentions of telling me that because even though we are friends, there's just some things that I don't really need to know. But not replying to you means I'm still unsure of what your feelings are. And I don't want to ruin everything especially now, if by chance, you are still weak and you need a friend. But I just can't be that friend right now, because everytime I come to your rescue, I always end up being hurt and confused.

And I think I'm not that vulnerable anymore, because if I still am, I would gladly open my arms to you and forget everything you did to me. But I can't do that anymore. And I don't wanna be like that anymore. I've suffered enough so I think it's just time I ignore you.

I know you're not really coming back because we've been through that a lot of times. And I've pondered that if you really liked me, or even love me, noon pa lang naging tayo na ulit. Hindi ako nagfi-feeling, I'm just forcing myself to be swayed again."

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After all, I have this load in my hands.

And I'm logging off. 'Ciao!

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